We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Two words: blizzard sex
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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