Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
