Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
