the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
