im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
