We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize