this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
