You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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