This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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