You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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