hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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