Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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