margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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