It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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