PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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