): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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