Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
