i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize