woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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