This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
