no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Randomize
