Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
