I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
