So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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