He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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