I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
His hands were made for my vagina.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
