ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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