that's an acceptable place to lick
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
