I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
