I cockslap morals
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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