Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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