This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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