im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize