listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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