Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
