ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
