Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
