We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
