even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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