we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize