Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Randomize