Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
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