Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
