At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
