do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
