your thong is hanging out like whoa
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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