I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize