My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
