I hate all girls vehemently.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
