You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
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