Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
