you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
